Remember how easy it was to get laid when you were sixteen? (If you are sixteen now, fuck you.) Sex was so simple - so innocent. Everyone was drunk and horny, everyone fucked everyone, and no one had STDs (well, that’s what I thought anyway).
People were honest about their lust. These days it’s all about playing games and secretly Facebook stalking. When did it all get so complicated? Fucking has turned into this giant procedure. You have to buy each other dinner, have loads of inane conversations of about your aspirations in life (which is even worse when you don’t have any), and worry about things like whether the person you’re sleeping with secretly has a wife and kids, or listens to the Bravery. Ugh.
But back to reminiscing. if the vague, wasted memories of my teenage years hold any truth, the prime time for adolescent hook-ups was definitely at the tail-end of parties. Birthday parties were basically just one big excuse to get all of your friends into one room so you could spend the night drinking discount vodka and licking each other. They were awkward sex utopias.
Words Karley Sciortino
Photos: Tom Beard