Since forming in 1983, Guided By Voices have officially released 17 ‘studio’ (in the loosest sense of the word) albums, 4 box sets containing nearly 400 songs, 1 live album, 4 compilations and innumerable 7”s, split singles and EPs. These figures are perhaps an underestimation. If some precocious internet loser were to draw up indie band Top Trumps, Guided By Voices would be Thor. They would slay everyone.
WORDS: STEPHEN PIETRZYKOWSKI
It’s because of this prolific output that it’s both astounding and predictable to discover that there’s a fifth 4 CD box set – Suitcase 3: Up We Go Now – to be released in November. It contains 100 songs. One-fucking-hundred songs! That alone is enough to constitute a career for any normal band, but Guided By Voices (GBV) and main songwriter Robert Pollard aren’t exactly standard. Just look at some of the song titles on the forthcoming box set – “Oh Pie”, “Pluto Is Polluted”, “My Dad Is A Motorboat”. It concerns me that Pollard is a schoolteacher with a mind that warped, although his efficiency is a good model for any child looking to go into production line management or accountancy. Ah, the folly of young dreams.
And it’s not only because of the latest compiled box set that GBV are worthy of a feature here. A number of the more exciting bands that are coming out of the UK right now (Male Bonding, PENS, Fair Ohs, Teen Sheikhs, to name a few), borrow heavily from their approach to home recording, even if they don’t really sound like them (no one sounds like GBV).
Defining the lo-fi aesthetic that’s now become somewhat of a gauche term, Pollard, whether alone or with the rest of the band, recorded many of his songs at home. This set up allowed them the freedom to record whenever they liked, indulging any fanciful idea or ridiculous concept they could imagine. And there were lots of ridiculous concepts, mainly involving putting words together that usually wouldn’t be. In the 1998 documentary Watch Me Jumpstart, Pollard claims that in the time it takes him to go to the toilet he could write five songs, of which at least two will be good. That’s not bad going, but it makes everyone else looks pretty lazy by comparison. I keep thinking they might be German. But it’s weird to think of them as that productive given the amount of beer they would drink when on stage – often at least a crate each. They’re regular Barney Gumbles. I’d barely be able to breath after consuming that much alcohol, let alone write a billion new songs.
If there’s excess in terms of the quantity of GBV music available, there’s no wasted time or space in terms of the songs themselves. They’re often short, sharp, rasping garage rock jams, with incomprehensible titles and more melody than The Beatles’ back catalogue (just with worse/better singing, depending on your preference). GBV songs have a habit of sticking in the mind, which is a problem when there’s so many of them floating around. Some days, I can’t think of anything else –maybe that’s what the band name is actually referring to? Once, I even crashed my car (and did so really badly) to a soundtrack of “Motor Away” from Mag Earwhig, which I blame entirely on the song’s sing-a-long quality. Dangerous.
They’ve also got celebrity fans too, with The Strokes both covering “A Salty Salute” and asking them to appear in the video for “Someday” in some sort of Family Fortunes style parody:
In writing this, I’ve assumed a degree of ignorance on the reader’s behalf, thinking that perhaps GBV are pretty much unknown to most. This is maybe unfair given that Bee Thousand features in nearly every Best of the 90s Top 100 list and they also had a song on a Buffy soundtrack too (“Teenage FBI”, remember it? Probably as close as they got to a hit, thanks to Buffy being the original Garden State). But for anyone new to the band, they’re more intimidating than The Fall in terms of where to start.
GBV have more songs than a song convention, and that’s not including all the solo albums and other monikers under which Robert Pollard and Tobin Sprout have released music, which, if we’re being honest, no one really needs in their life regardless of how good they may or may not be. Even hardcore fans struggle to keep up. They might be lo-fi sounding, but they’re really bloody expensive to be a fan of.
I was going to do a Top 10 GBV song list, but that’s a stupid idea because I’ve not heard a fair percentage of their songs to be able to make that judgment. Probably only Robert Pollard truly qualifies for that responsibility. So, instead I’ve just streamed a few with my favourite titles and the funniest/strangest lyrics:
“Kicker of Elves”
12 Big Chief Chinese Restaurant
“Big Chief Chinese Restaurant”
11 Choking Tara (Creamy Version)
“Choking Tara (Creamy version)”
“Game of Pricks”
“Mushroom Art”
